Hear Your Voice Again
by Suuz-5-5
Summary: All he wanted was to just to hear her voice again. One-shot. Set between season 2 finale and beginning of season 3. Or so I assume. It's just an idea of what could happen.


**I don't own Crossing Lines nor** ** _Cryin' For Me_** **by Toby Keith! My native language is Dutch and I'm dyslectic so sorry for any mistakes.**

 **The story is set somewhere in season 3, which hasn't aired yet. However there are spoilers for the season 2 finale, in case you haven't seen it yet. This is just an idea that I got for the next season.**

 **The one-shot was inspired by the song** ** _Cryin' For Me_** **by Toby Keith**

 _Hear Your Voice Again_

Tommy hadn't gone to her funeral. He couldn't listen to all those stories about her, all the sweet memories. It was too much. Instead he had sat at home, drinking beer. There had been too many goodbyes in the last year and he had never wanted to say goodbye to her. He had been numb for days. People spoke to him but he didn't hear a word. He had expected to feel anger but instead there was this big emptiness within him. It just wasn't right without her by his side.

It had been a Sunday afternoon, when he was all by himself in the office, when he first saw those pictures. He hadn't seen them before, nor had he seen the actual room. Sebastian had stopped him from going inside and Arabela had stood beside them with tears in her eyes. At that moment Tommy knew: they had been too late. They had been too late with the Major and now with Eva as well. Tommy had stepped away and took several deep breaths. She had called him. She had asked _him_ for his help and he had blown her off. Told her that he was too busy with work. Abruptly he had turned away from Sebastian and Arabela and walked away. Away from the room, the hotel and the realization that she was gone. That maybe if he had gotten far away enough, it wasn't be real. However he had looked at those pictures and he couldn't escape it any longer. She was truly gone. The bed had been covered in blood, the sheets soaking in the red liquid. Blood sprays were all over the walls. It looked like a scene from a horror movie, but it was reality. It was her brutal murder. With realization setting in, the tears began to fall from his eyes. He hadn't even noticed Hickman coming into the room until the older man put a hand on his shoulder.

Now Tommy was lying in his bed and staring at the bare ceiling above him, like he had done so many nights. Ever since that Sunday afternoon he was having trouble sleeping. If he closed his eyes he would see every detail of those photos. Even during the day they were haunting him, but then it was easier to push them away. It was on his mind most of the time. He didn't understand how her father could have done such a thing to her. She was his daughter, his own flesh and blood. Her father probably had some explanation and he had probably given it many times, but Tommy had never bothered to hear or read it. He hadn't gone to the trials nor had he been there when her father was shipped off to jail to serve a life sentence. He had been at home.

' _This is Eva Vittoria. I'm not here. Please leave a message and your phone number right after the beep and I will get back to you._ ' BEEP.

Tommy took a deep breath and put the phone down. His finger hovered over the redial button but he decided against it. Instead he placed the phone back on the nightstand. Her voicemail message was stuck in his mind. He had heard it a thousand times. He had heard it when he tried to call her back in Marseille and ever since she had died. Every now and then he just had to call the number, even when he knew there would never be an answer again. He just had to hear her voice again.

Her smile was broad and genuine, and it was the one thing that struck him most. Tommy liked looking at the picture, even when it brought feelings of sadness along. It was a picture of the team, of how it used to be: the Major, Hickman, Arabela, Eva and himself. They had all gone to a bar to celebrate a successful day of work. Eva was what drew him in the most. He missed her smile. He missed her. Days had become lonely without their occasional movie nights or her Italian dinners. He missed having her close to him.

The phone felt heavier in his hand the longer he looked at the picture. It had become some kind of ritual before he went anywhere. He looked at it first thing in the morning and it was the last thing before he went to try to go to sleep. He took the picture down and stared at his phone. Then, almost on automatic pilot, he dialed the number again.

' _This is Eva Vittoria. I'm not here. Please leave a message and your phone number right after the beep and I will get back to you._ ' BEEP.

Some days Tommy got angry with the entire world. Mostly with himself for not showing up when Eva needed him the most. He always wanted to be there for her, and had said he would, but in that moment the job had been more important. If he had said that he was on his way, maybe she would have been still alive. He might not even have gotten shot. They had lost so much time when he was unconscious in the hospital.

Some days he even got angry with Eva. If she hadn't been too stubborn to ask for help long before she met up with her father, maybe she would have been alive. She had waited till the very last moment to call him. She could have told him days before she was going after her father. Instead she stayed quiet and said everything was alright. Why had this been something she had to do by herself? On those days he called her and left her an angry message. Only to regret it the very moment he hung up. There was no use telling her now.

' _This is Eva Vittoria. I'm not here. Please leave a message and your phone number right after the beep and I will get back to you._ ' BEEP.

Tommy took a deep breath as he hung up the phone and headed straight into the building of the ICC. He walked straight towards the Major's office, or what used to be his office. Strand looked up from her papers, surprised when he appeared in front of her.

'McConnel?' she greeted him, 'what brings you here?' Tommy placed the envelope that was burning a hole in his pocket on her desk.

'I hereby resign from the ICC,' Tommy stated with a formal tone and he turned around with the intention to walk straight out of the office again.

'Tommy...' Something in her voice made him stop in his tracks. She hadn't called him Tommy many times before since she took the team over a couple of weeks ago. 'You don't have to do this. I understand this is a difficult time for you and the entire team. Dorn and I have discussed this several times and you can take all the time you need. You shouldn't make rushed decisions...' Tommy turned his head to face his new boss.

'It's not rushed,' he told her and he walked out of the office. The choice had been on his mind for several weeks now. All he realized was that he couldn't do this anymore without her. He had tried to get back to normal, but everything here had reminded him of Eva. He had come to the Netherlands for this job and he had arrived around the same time as Eva. Each other was all they had in this small country in the beginning. He couldn't be here anymore without day they would be together again, but until that moment he was all by himself on Earth while she was up there. The distance between them was too big. All he had was one voicemail message to hear her voice again.

' _This is Eva Vittoria. I'm not here. Please leave a message and your phone number right after the beep and I will get back to you._ ' BEEP.

'Why couldn't you just have waited for me to come there? Why did you have to be so bloody stubborn, Eva?! If you had told me earlier I would have been there! I don't have superpowers! I can't be there within seconds! This was not something you could handle alone. Why did you have to be so fucking selfish and stupid?! Did you even think about us when you left?! I have lost you and what am I supposed to without _you_?'

And still words were left unspoken.

 **The End**

 **Thank you to cdub77 and my sister for being my betas for this one-shot!**


End file.
